Monday, February 2, 2009

Loss

In the white
cotton quiet
amid the ragged
rise
and fall,
rise and fall,
your fingers write
memories
on counterpanes
in disappearing
ink.

20 comments:

  1. Really lovely. Suggestive and captivating at the same time. This really shows the power of poetry.

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  2. Simple, sad effective words evoking deep pain.

    (BTW, I can't remember if I thanked you for the award. Most kind of you.)

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  3. I'm speechless. This, in so few words, is so powerful. (Paired perfectly with the picture!)

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  4. Beautiful and thought provoking. I had to look up counterpanes, I've never heard that before. So that took the poem to a whole different place of sad and disturbed dreams. It works perfectly with the image.

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  5. I love the simplicity and power of this.

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  6. Dave - Thank you. I value your opinion, and I am pleased that you like it.

    GeL - Yes, the pain is there. Writing it makes it real again but honors it, too.

    Roberta - It took me quite a while to find a painting I thought reflected the poem. This is by Andrew Wyeth's sister Ann Wyeth McCoy. Thanks for your kind comments.

    Cat - Somehow, "counterpanes" was the only word that would do and is key, in my opinion. Thanks for continuing to read. I value your comments.

    RachelW - Thanks for stopping by and for the encouragement.

    Jennifer -- Thank you!

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  7. So lovely in its modest brevity, this poem suggests a quiet longing for something lost. (rise and fall, memories, disappearing)

    It has an unpretentious quality that makes it sincere. The painting and poem are perfectly balanced.

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  8. beautiful, Karen. I can't believe you ever shied away from poetry. You have a poet's heart!

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  9. What a sad and evocative poem... Very beautiful, despite the sensed grief.
    And the painting complements it in a heartbreaking way.


    (Karen, I would like to thank you again for thinking of me for the award. Much appreciated!0

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  10. i am with bluesugarpoet. this is intimate and universal and wistful and wrenching all at once - and perfectly fleeting - a sigh that says more in its moment than any amount of words.

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  11. this is sad and lonely and beautifully made

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  12. K. - Yes, the loss is there. I worried about the use of "disappearing ink" because I didn't want it to have comic book connotations, but I couldn't think of any other way to describe the telling of these tales. Thanks for your feedback.

    I love this painting. Those Wyeth's knew what they were doing. :)

    bluesugarpoet - What a very nice thing to say. Every time I write a poem I wonder if it's the last one. Keats claimed to have a teeming brain. I worry that mine doesn't "teem" enough, but you said, "poet's heart" -- I'll take that, gladly! Thank you.

    Vesper - Yes, the grief is there with every breath. I think the bed in the painting -- empty -- says a great deal. Thank you for reading and commenting.

    joaquin - Your comments are high compliments, and I feel honored to have you describe this small poem in this way. Thank you.

    Crafty Green Poet - Welcome! Thank you for stopping by and commenting.

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  13. Such an ache in its somber simplicity, Karen. And perfectly matched to that painting.

    I was going to quote back my favorite lines, but really, I just love the whole thing. It evokes loss and longing with every rise and fall.

    It wouldn't hurt so terribly if we weren't also capable of loving so wholly.

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  14. Thank you, Sarah. It is simple, but this sort of pain really is uncomplicated; it just IS.

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  15. I'm reminded of all those times I spent sleeping at my grandmothers.

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  16. That was truly a beautiful reflection on dreams! Excellent!!

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  17. It's so ghostly - haunting and as others have said, lovely.

    Kat

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  18. Karen, I am awarding you with the Fabulous Blog award. Please come to my site to pick it up!

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  19. JR - I'm glad it evoked that recollection for you. "Grandma" is exactly who I had in mind when I wrote this one.

    Jason - I had hoped that the poem would be ambiguous enough that it could be interpreted as a poem about dreaming. I'm happy that it was.

    Poetikat - Thank you. You have gone right to the heart of it with your adjectives. I am haunted by this memory, for sure.

    Cat - I can't believe this! Thank you so much!

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